While I did not feel sad (I was more curious than anything), a single tear very slowly flowed down my right cheek. Then a single tear slowly came down my left cheek. Then more and more tears came until they were flowing uncontrollably, yet I wasn’t crying. It was as though my body, my eyes specifically, sensed what was happening before I did. The tears slowed down and then at that point I saw glowing orbs of luminous lights, many of them, infinite numbers, forming a sort of line, and while they did not look human or angel-like, I sensed they were connected to me. I felt that the “lights” nearer to me were deceased family members who were close to me in this lifetime. The ones behind them were also connected to me but I don’t know exactly how. I felt they were ancestor spirits or connected to me from previous lives.

My father stepped forward. I should probably backtrack and explain that I never met my father. He died when he was 29 years old. I was 10. Before he died I remember asking about him, being curious to meet him, even expressing the wish to meet him to my mother, grandmother, and aunt. Then he was murdered so I never had the chance. In my child’s mind I felt guilty that he died, as though he did it to escape meeting me. It sounds crazy but I associated my desire to know him as leading to his early death because he died shortly after I expressed that I wanted to meet him. So I felt guilty for wanting to know him, to see him, to hear him, to love him. In my mind it was as though voicing my wish to have a relationship with him was what him killed him. I buried my feelings of guilt for a long time but they were always present on a subconscious level, eventually surfacing as the personal pain I felt as a teenager and young adult.

When my father came forward we began communicating. While there were thoughts/words exchanged, we weren’t talking in the normal sense. I didn’t feel I was using my vocal chords to make sounds but we were communicating instantaneously nevertheless- like mind to mind (telepathy?). I “said” something along the lines of “Am I allowed to love you?” He said, “I’ve always been here. I’ve always loved you”. The feeling between us was very much connected, very peaceful, and very beautiful, as though everything was in the right place. As we spent some time in each other’s presence, I felt my soul and also my mind was growing and gaining a lot of knowledge a very quick rate. The time we spent together may have been a few seconds or a few millennia or perhaps both, but however long or short it was, it was enough time for us to share our feelings and raise our awareness about how our souls are deeply connected throughout all time.